Resolving the Unresolved

Sometimes people don’t look at certain dark corners of their lives because they either want to keep their options open or they don’t want to “collapse the wave function” to a negative outcome.

For instance, suppose you’re in a relationship and you suspect that your partner is secretly cheating on you. Or suppose you have a job and want a promotion, and you’re worried that your boss has already excluded you from consideration. Maybe you figure that looking for the truth is worse than not knowing.

Knowing is generally better though. If you avoid collapsing the wave function to resolve reality, you may feel that you’re keeping the possibility space open, so a good outcome remains possible. This approach only works well if you’re genuinely happy and excited about having an open field of possibilities, like having a pile of gifts in front of you and enjoying the anticipation of not knowing what’s in them yet.

If you’re looking at a field of possibilities where some outcomes seem good, some bad, some neutral, some amazing, and some dreadful, then you’re already reacting emotionally to possible outcomes. You’re flowing energy towards those open possibilities instead of letting your energy flow into just one – the resolved one based on collapsing the space into events. This prevents your story from progressing and keeps you stuck on pause.

Sooner or later, you’ll realize it’s better to know the truth, so you can move on from this point of stuckness, even if the initial outcome doesn’t seem good for you. People typically feel relieved – an increase in energy flow – shortly after they discover the truth, even if it’s not the outcome they wanted.

Maybe you find out that your partner really is cheating. Maybe you learn that your boss isn’t seriously considering promoting you. Maybe you look for the truth and dislike it very much. But once you see the truth in whatever way it resolves, you can now fully process your feelings about it, accept it, move through it, and grow beyond it. You don’t have to keep flowing energy into the entire field of possibilities, always wondering, hoping, fearing, intending, wishing, etc.

Maybe the real truth isn’t decided till you look, especially if reality is a simulation. You may as well look though. Advance the story. Advance your character. Free up that stuck energy, so you can use it to good effect.

Being stuck in limbo because you haven’t resolved the truth is a waste of energy, but you can leave reality unresolved when you want an intentional pause. If you’ve been leaving a possibility space open for a while, consider whether you may be doing that purposefully, in service of a hidden goal. Then consider that your goal may be better served by resolving the truth and responding to it appropriately. Even if the immediate outcome is a setback, it’s better to deal with the setback and move past it. Staying in limbo doesn’t actually move your goal forward.

You can collapse the possibility space by looking into the facts and details and getting more information. You can also collapse it by making new decisions for yourself or raising your standards. You could declare that feeling ambivalent about a relationship or a job – and always wondering where you really stand with your partner or boss – isn’t good enough. And you could decide to leave on that basis alone. Perhaps you’d rather invest in people who are more direct, open, and honest, so you don’t have to remain stuck in relationship or career ambivalence. You could resolve to trust your intuitive feelings.

You don’t have to remain in the unresolved space except by choice. Even if you can’t get the exact information you want, you can still decide to resolve such situations by exercising your power of decision.